“Do they have the same dad?”
This question and so many like it were asked daily from complete strangers and to be honest it really brought me down. You see, I fell in love at sixteen, to a boy that was out of my league. This shy girl who suffered with body dysmorphia and severe anxiety had been wooed by an olive skinned charming Italian lad. And it wasn’t long after my eighteenth birthday, we found out we were expecting our first child.
Growing up my parents has shielded me as much as possible from the world around me, I was a good kid, who didn’t break the rules, I wasn’t allowed to sit in the park drinking cider from a bottle, I had no idea what sex was, and if a kissing scene came on the tv, I would hide in embarrassment behind the curtains. I was devoted to my boyband and crushed on Michael J fox.
So, when I met Adriano outside the college gates I instantly fell in love. He was the boy all the girls wanted; I was the girl all the boys laughed at. But somehow, we just worked. Having been shielded I was surprised when my mum agreed for me to go abroad with Adriano for My eighteenth birthday, His parents would be there and there were strict instructions given by my mum that they were to follow. One of those being that we slept in different rooms.
I wasn’t a virgin, it wasn’t my first time, but this time my life was about to change forever, “Serena you’re expecting a baby” ….
Instant dread came over me, what was I going to do, I couldn’t tell my mum, I had told her we had slept in different rooms, she was going to go mad, and how was I at eighteen going to take care of a baby.
I was convinced my mum was going to freak, in my head as the doctor was talking to me about my options all I could think was I’m going to be grounded forever. My brain continued to run away with itself, the doctors voice became a blur. I felt sick, I just wanted to run away and hide.
I have had five children, and each time you find out you’re expecting, it’s a little scary right. But at just eighteen and with a mum who was so strict I was petrified.
My life was about to change forever.
Adriano was so loving and accepted his responsibilities as we embarked this journey together, but We had decided not to tell anyone, not yet. We needed time to come to terms with this news. I went home feeling sick, worrying that my mum could see right through me and would instantly know. But for a moment everything felt normal. My sister wandered into my room, she is three years younger than me and a pain in the butt. She wouldn’t leave, I wanted to have time to think, and we got into a fight, this resulted in me beginning to bleed, and I freaked out.
My parents couldn’t console me, and eventually the words came out, “I’m pregnant” those moments between felt like an eternity. The silence was deafening, and it felt like everything went into slow motion. My parents stood staring in disbelief, as I sobbed uncontrollably in front of them.
Luckily after a night in hospital all went well with my pregnancy, I began to feel more confident and began to share the news with Friends, as a teenager you really do find out who your friends are in times like this. One by one they eventually disappeared, busy with Uni, and partying till all hours, and whilst they were out making their memories, I was home snuggled up to a beautiful baby boy.
Nathan was my saviour, I instantly fell in love with his chubby cheeks, he gave me purpose in life, a sense of belonging, and I was going to prove everyone wrong. During my pregnancy it was as if the world and their dog had an opinion on how I would cope, how long my relationship with Adriano would last and where we would be living. Council estate mum, benefit mum, single mum with many kids by different men were all mentioned and aimed at me, what made it worse was I only looked about 15 max, I was petite, insecure and suffering with postnatal depression, and I took everything to heart.
I felt alone, this s*** was scary, everyone seemed to have it in for us, we were children ourselves, with no life experience, could I really prove them wrong?
I am so grateful for my family and their support especially in those early days. And I am so grateful that I was brought up to have strength and courage to pull through in the toughest of times, I have brought up one of the most loving and sweetest men I know, he is a testament to my love and dedication.
I also have Adriano by my side and this month we celebrate our 20th Wedding anniversary. We have walked side by side, through teen pregnancy and terminal cancer diagnosis. We never allowed society's expectations dictate our path, we may have been teen parents, but we followed our own path. We let the haters hate, and we focused on our family, on our dreams.
I am proud to have been a teenage mum, I am proud to be a successful business owner. But most of all I am proud to be me, and to believe even in the toughest times that I can do anything I set my mind to.
Serena Novelli
Serena Novelli is a NO1 best selling Author, keynote speaker and a Sex love and relationship coach based in Surrey in the UK. Together alongside Ana Bonasera and Laura Bland, Serena Founded the company Love thy body project, A company supporting women across the globe to feel more confident and comfortable in the skin they are in.
Serena has mentored 44 women as they have embarked on their writing journey and works with her clients in group settings and 1-1 on building their intimacy with self.
Serena’s mission is to support women in unleashing their inner diva both in and out of the bedroom. And September sees the launch of her first Full year Diva divine intimacy program.
For more information on how to work with Serena, visit
www.lovethybodyproject.com